Not Me Monday

(3 Giveaways below are open for entrants until Wednesday night!) I did not leave my three year old unattended in the shower for two minutes...That would be irresponsible. And upon return, I did not find her dispensing a large amount of:

vanilla smoothie scented

silky smooth legs

hair remover cream

into her hand which she intended to use as shampoo. (...thank God I wasn't a minute later. Oh my goodness...I have nightmares just thinking about that!)...that is if it had actually happened...

which of course did not.

Not me!

And that hot pink long sleeved shirt that Izzy spilled spaghetti sauce on....

Yeah, about that.

Running out the door the next morning and upon realizing that it was significantly colder than I'd dressed the kids for, I did not rummage through the dirty laundry pile to find that same spaghetti stained shirt to layer under the dress Izzy was wearing.

The stain didn't show or anything...I mean if I had done that, it wouldn't show.

But I would never stoop that low!

Not me!

And I would never let the kids bathroom get so grimy and grungy that my five year old would have to pipe up and tell me, "Mommy, that bathroom really needs to be cleaned!". Nope, not me! I keep toilets and sinks pristine all the time!

Anybody else have confessions to make about what absurd things absolutely did not happen to them this week? It would make me feel better if you did.....

...that is if I had...which I didnt...

Not me!