Monday, May 2, 2011

Change is....good.


Last night was Evie's first night in her "Big Girl" Room. Yes, I know she's three and much too old to still be sleeping in our room, but largely that had to do with not having a place to put her. The other three girls were sharing a room, Tristan has his own and until C finished remodeling this room, there wasnt really space for her. And who am I kidding? I really loved having her in a cot next to me! Until very recently, she was still waking up every night with sleep disorders from her reflux, so it made sense to have her close by.
With the new baby only weeks away from arrival, I knew it was "time". Good grief. You'd think I was ushering her out of the nest and sending her off to college!
Sweet dreams little Sleeping Beauties!
We just finished her and Izzy's "Garden" themed room and the girls had so much fun helping me pick out the colors and "spring" pink and green items to make it girly-girl. We're actually getting to give away a Room Makeover this week as well on our Giveaway blog HERE. Check it out!
This bakers rack was in my room when I was a little girl. I found Michaels baskets on clearance right around Easter and made this into our closet/dresser. The mirror above their bed has one of my favorite verses scripted on it.
"The winter is past
The rains are over and gone
Flowers appear on the earth
The season of singing has come"
Evie did pretty good. She fussed a little when she got up to go potty and we told her she had to go back to her bed instead of our room. Me on the other hand....
I kept dreaming that I couldnt find her pulse ox monitor to get a reading on her oxygen saturations and she was turning blue and I was freaking out. Think perhaps Im the only one dealing with a little separation anxiety:)
Ill be honest, Im having a bit of a hard time thinking how our relationship will change in the next few weeks. Ive talked to another heart momma friend who gets it. Its not that I want her to stay a baby. I dont want to indulge her or allow her a sense of entitlement. God knows this is the best thing for her. All our other children have been 18-24 months apart, so this is the biggest gap we've ever had and I think it will be really, really good for Evie to have a younger sister and reminder that the world doesnt revolve around her. But there is something different with these heart kids. There just is. I dont even know how to put my finger on it. There were so many times I couldnt even imagine her surviving infanthood. The thought of her becoming a big sister one day never even crossed my mind. But when you've spent sleepless nights praying over hospital beds for one more day with your child...and whispered in her ear that you'll do anything for her if she'll just keep fighting for her life...then you find yourself three years later still glancing back occasionally to what your life might have been like without her.
I know things will change with the arrival of a new baby and change is always hard. I wont be able to hold Evie every time she wants because my lap will be full with a nursing baby. She'll have to take a number in line when she wants a story read to her and Im juggling a fussy little one. Painting her toes will come after changing Gigi's diapers. And snuggling her to sleep at night will be a luxury when Gigi cooperates to let me do so.
She has SO anxiously been anticipating Gabriella's arrival. She loves feeling her kick and sings to her little sister all the time. I think she's going to do just fine....
It will be a change.
It may be hard.
But it will be good!

Dont you think she's going to make a sweet big sis?!?!

8 comments:

Trini said...

AW! I love the video! She looks so much older than four...

Luna Belle Boutique said...

So sweet! I know Evie will make the perfect "big sister". She has those pats on the back down perfect and looks like she's enjoying every minute of it!

Karen said...

wow...lovely room. Praying for you friend...and all the changes for your family! :) love you!

Shannon said...

I SO get it!!

The room looks great and Evie will be a wonderful big sister. In fact, she may need to give lessons. ;)

Big hugs!!

~S

Anonymous said...

Love this Mandy! :)

lneal22 said...

So pretty and so girly! We are praying for you and Gigi as she gets ready to meet her amazing family! God's promises are dependable...He is able!

Bethany said...

I found your blog via John and Christine's. I'm pretty sure we know each other from TeenPact. (?)

Anyway, I just wanted to say your family is beautiful. I had read Evie's story a while ago but haven't been over to your blog. Evie is going to make a fabulous big sister. Look at her! The "gap" is hard, but there are some benefits. I wanted all our kids to be within two years, but God had other plans. Now, I wouldn't trade that bit of space between our girls for anything. Congratulations on your new little one!

Love All Over the Land said...

Your post always brings tears to my eyes.....love you!

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